always involved, but most men can have sex without the act trig- gering an emotional response in them.   This is the reason that prostitutes have always been doing business with men on a quickie basis, while the few gigolos (male prostitutes for women) that exist almost always perform for a long term.   You need to understand this fact because if you ever catch your man having sex with another woman, you shouldnt throw away a long-term relationship without doing a careful evaluation. If it really looks like he was only in it for the sex, and if you both love each other, you may be able to save your rela- tionship. Im certainly not advocating sticking around with a philanderer, the guy who does it over and over again. But in some instances youd be better off forgiving and forgetting (although you can never totally forget).     The Older a Man Gets, the More Help He Needs   Not every man knows that, at some point in his life, he loses the ability to have a psychogenic erection - an erection that comes by itself, without any physical manipulation - but its a fact. This problem doesnt signal the end of your love life; instead, it means that your partner now needs foreplay as much as you do.   Some of you women may decide that this is the moment to pay him back for all the times that he didnt give you enough foreplay, but Im telling you not to play those games. When this change first starts to happen to a man, he gets pretty upset about it. The first few times he runs across a situation where his penis used to take off for the races by itself and now just lies there can be downright scary. So have mercy on him and dont add to his plight.   If your man experiences these types of difficulties, definitely read Chapter 20 on male sexual problems to find out as much as you can about what is hap- pening to him and how you can help.       Chapter 29   Ten Tips for Truly Great Lovers     In This Chapter Setting the mood